Category: trust

Eyes Front

Photo of road leading to sunset.
Photo copyright ©2017 David J Crone. All rights reserved.

Keep your eyes on the road. Never look back. Eyes on the prize. We’re in it for the long haul.

There are so many cliched sayings on the topic of staying focused on our goals.

Why is it so hard to stay the course when pursuing a long term goal or dream?

I blame Amazon.

Thanks to Amazon, we expect 2-day delivery of nearly anything. In some cases, we can get 2-hour delivery. Or, if you’re willing to pay for it, some items will even be delivered in 1 hour. Quite a far cry from the way I grew up.

Have you ever purchased something on layaway? Does anyone still do that?

The last time I bought something on a layaway plan was 34 years ago – an engagement ring. (I could say, “and I’m still paying for it.” But, the reality is, it remains the best purchase I have ever made.)

How about saving box tops? Do you remember that? This was a common thing when I was a kid. By sending in the tops from boxes of cereal, along with a small amount to cover shipping and handling, you could get all kinds of great prizes.

I got my start as a magician with a trick I got in a box of cereal. Wheat Chex, to be exact. From there, I saved box tops to send away for a full-fledged magic kit. It required 6 box tops. Do you know how long it takes to save up 6 box tops? In our house, it was not a thing to buy 6 boxes of cereal at a time. And it certainly was not OK to open a new box until the current one was all gone. And, no, it was not OK to eat cereal for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

After collecting all of the required box tops, you had to mail them via standard US postal delivery, then wait 6-8 weeks for delivery of your long coveted prize. There was no such thing as overnight delivery. I remember checking the mail every day for the entire time in anticipation of the fantastic prize.

Would anyone do that today?

With instant downloads on the Internet, on-demand streaming of movies, and overnight delivery (or less) of nearly anything, we have been trained to think everything should happen quickly.

With that mindset, we get frustrated by how long things take. We think we should be able to achieve anything by next week at the latest.

I started my career as a software engineer. I used to work on projects that were measured in months, sometimes many, many months. Now when I launch into a new project on my website, I get frustrated when I don’t have it done before lunchtime.

In my current career as entertainer and speaker, I often get frustrated because things are not where I’d like them to be. Why is this taking so long?

Then I pause to look back and realize how far I have come. I watch video from events I did a few years ago and compare that with video from one I did last week. Wow! Maybe I am making progress. Maybe things are on track.

Are you feeling frustrated? Do you feel like you’re never going to get there? (Wherever “there” is for you.)

Try this. Take your eyes off the road. Do look back. See how far you have already come. Acknowledge your progress.

Now you can go back to eyes front. Eyes on the prize. Sure, it’s a long haul. Might as well settle in and enjoy the ride.

And once in a while, check that rear view mirror.

 

Disappointment Correction

Photo of giraffe sticking tongue out
Photo copyright ©2017 David J Crone. All rights reserved.

Have you ever been disappointed? What did you do in response?

During a recent meeting with our financial advisor, he said there is a high level of expectation among financial experts for a “disappointment correction” in the stock markets. I’d never heard the term before, but he claimed it is a well-known term in the financial sector.

Here’s one story about the concept.

The gist of this is that investors are disappointed by things not going the way they had anticipated. As a result, they will make adjustments, or corrections, in their holdings and strategies.

The term struck me as being apt for describing what happens in the workplace.

The company promises certain things, setting expectations for the employees. If done right, the employees get all excited about these promises and new ventures. They have renewed energy and focus. They work harder. Then, if things don’t pan out as expected, people become disappointed. Sometimes they will become so disappointed that they make drastic corrections, like moving on to another employer.

It’s a difficult road to travel for leaders. You want to paint a rosy picture, share possibilities, get people excited for what is yet to come. But, if you paint too rosy of a picture, or can’t follow through on those promises, you have to expect some level of frustration and disappointment among the staff. You have to be ready for the corrections.

Then there is the issue of hiring someone who turns out to be a poor fit for the position. The new person starts, everyone is excited, and then disappointment sets in because, well, they aren’t actually qualified for the position. Or, perhaps the job duties were not clearly explained during the interview process. Or, maybe the true nature of the work environment was not clearly articulated. There is a mismatch in expectations. The result is that the hiring manager needs to make a correction.

This can happen on the other side as well. I once started a new job full of eager anticipation. By the end of the first week I realized the job was not what I expected. I was disappointed. I needed to make a correction. It took me a full year to make the correction by changing jobs. The second time this happened, it only took me 5 weeks.

A workplace correction is not always a major deal. Sometimes it only requires a minor tweak to the environment, like a change of your office layout, a new computer, or bringing in a pair of headphones to drown out that annoying gum cracking in the cubicle next to you. Sometimes it means changing the people assigned to a project, or their specific roles within the team. It doesn’t always have to end in parting company.

Disappointment can show up in so many areas of our lives. When it happens, we have a choice. We can be sad, or we can take action – make a correction.

Be aware of your disappointment. Let it motivate you to do what needs to be done to move on. Sometimes a mental shift is the only correction needed, while other times serious changes in lifestyle are needed.

Where are you now? Are your expectations being met? Are you disappointed? If so, it might be time for a correction.

 

Intelligent Disobedience

Photo of dog giving a raspberry
Photo copyright ©2017 David J Crone. All rights reserved.

Do you know when to say, “No!”?

Have you ever seen a blind person with a guide dog? I am fascinated by helper dogs, and guide dogs in particular. Columbus is the home to Pilot Dogs, a training facility for these four legged partners.

I heard a presentation by Pilot Dogs at a recent meeting of the Lions Club to which I belong. We heard a brief overview of the intense training regimen involved in taking a dog from birth through full employment as a Pilot Dog. One thing in particular jumped out at me – the concept of intelligent disobedience.

Our presenter explained that the dogs are trained to say “no” to the person they are guiding when the situation warrants it.

Imagine a blind person with a guide dog standing at a street corner. The person wants to go and starts to step off the curb. Meanwhile, the dog sees a dangerous situation and resists. Despite the person urging the dog to go, the dog refuses. They disobey. The person might become frustrated, but also must trust the dog.

Our presenter indicated that this has become an increasingly important behavior due to the increase in all-electric vehicles that do not provide the audible engine noise clues of traditional gasoline vehicles.

Does your company culture support intelligent disobedience? Does your boss allow you to say “no” when you know that what you are being asked to do is wrong? Maybe it is unsafe. Maybe it is simply stupid. Maybe the results of doing what you are being asked to do will be counter to the objective.

Being willing to stand up and say “no” to something you have been asked to do is a valuable skill. It requires confidence, courage, tact and a strong working relationship with the person you are saying “no” to. It also requires a culture that makes this behavior acceptable.

As a leader, fostering a culture that allows intelligent disobedience requires effort. It is not a natural behavior. It is critical to avoiding costly and even dangerous mistakes. And it is totally worth the effort.

Learn to say “no” when the situation calls for it – and be ready to explain why. Learn to accept “no” when you have asked someone to do something – and be open to a discussion about why.

Practice intelligent disobedience.

 

Creative Collaboration

Photo copyright ©2004 David J Crone. All rights reserved.

When you think of a creative person, do you immediately think, “artist”?

When you think of an artist, do you imagine them holed up, all alone in their studio?
We often associate “creativity” with “artist”. It is natural, then, to think being creative means being individualistic and working alone.
We rarely associate creativity with collaboration, which is all about working with other people. On the surface, these two concepts seem at odds with each other.
Collaboration implies practicality and goal orientation toward a shared objective.
Creativity implies artistry and individualism toward a personal vision.
Intense artistic creativity taps into our most deeply held beliefs, dreams, visions and even fears.
Sharing that creativity involves baring our soul. It leaves us exposed. It makes us vulnerable. Fearing this vulnerability, many people hide their creativity. They either resist creating altogether, or they never share their creations with anyone else.
Collaboration is all about sharing. It requires us to be open to feedback – both positive and negative.
Collaboration requires that we share our creativity, and thus forces us to make ourselves vulnerable.
So, how can these two words go together?
Let’s start by looking at the words themselves.
Creativity:
“the use of the imagination or original ideas, especially in the production of an artistic work.” – Google Dictionary
Collaboration:
“the action of working with someone to produce or create something.” – Google Dictionary
See what just happened there? The Google Dictionary definition used the word “create” in its description of collaboration. We might be onto something here.
Creativity cannot happen in a vacuum. Creativity is fueled by our environment and by sensory input. We observe. We watch. We listen. We absorb. Then we mix it all together and create something new.
Collaboration increases that sensory input. It adds to our environment. It provides alternate points of view, additional ideas. It fuels additional creativity.
When Collaboration and Creativity combine, we get what I call Applied Creativity – applying creativity to reach an objective, or to solve a problem. For me, that’s when things really get to be fun.
When we can work collaboratively, encouraging and fueling each others’ creativity, our own creativity increases, we get much better solutions and we have more fun doing it.
Go find a creative soulmate and collaborate. It’s fun!

Getting Ahead

Photo of kids running football
Photo copyright ©2017 David J Crone. All rights reserved.

When you hear the term, “Getting ahead”, what is your first thought? Do you immediately compare your current situation to that of other people?

Don’t worry if you do. That would make you completely normal. And wrong.

Life is not a race. Neither is a career.

In a race, everything is relative to the others in the race. There are clear winners and non-winners (OK, losers).

I have nothing against competitive sports and the concept of winners and losers in that context. But, I have a big issue with viewing everything in life and work through the same lens. It’s not necessary.

If you have good things happen in your life, I am happy for you. Your success does not define my failure. Some people struggle with this concept.

What if we viewed the term, “Getting ahead” as purely a personal reflection? What happens to our general outlook if we define “ahead” in terms of our own history instead of some skewed view of a random person down the street or in the cubicle across the hall?

While I was never a golf fanatic, there was a time in my life when I played on a fairly regular basis. I played with many different people of wildly different skill levels. Regardless of skill level, I find golfers fall into two categories: those who compare their score against those they are playing with – winning is everything – and those who compare their score against their own scores on previous rounds. I have always found those in the latter category much more fun to be around.

The “comparing to myself” players who were better golfers than me (usually the case) took the time to coach me and help me with my abilities. They wanted me to be a better player. They realized it is more fun to be around golfers of higher skill levels, so if they could help me improve, future outings would be more fun for all.

Meanwhile, the “comparing my score to this foursome” players, regardless of skill level, were far more likely to cheat to improve their score and complain if I, in my efforts to simply learn the mechanics of the game and keep things moving, nudged my ball into a slightly better position. (What? Cheat? Me? Nah…)

When we treat “Getting ahead” as purely a personal assessment, we are more apt to reach out and help others around us. We realize life is not a zero sum game. Others do not need to lose in order for us to win. It’s a heck of a lot more fun to hang around others who are good at their game. If we can help others around us improve, it’s more fun for us to play together and everyone wins.

Go on, get ahead.

Roll the Credits

Photo of kids celebrating
Photo copyright ©2004 David J Crone. All rights reserved

There are two types of movie goers: those who sit through the credits at the end and those who don’t.

Which one are you?

My wife and I are credit sitterthroughers. (That’s a real word. Look it up.) We are often the last ones out of the theater, sometimes soliciting glares from the cleaning staff waiting to do their jobs.

Some movies include fun things mixed into the credits, e.g. bloopers, outtakes, or teaser clips for future movies. Also, the occasional made-up title or name thrown in just for fun. Pay attention to the credits of a Monty Python movie, for instance.

While those are fun, that’s not why we stay.

I am fascinated by the long litany of roles listed at the end of major motion pictures. Hair stylists. Assistant to Mr. Clooney. Caterers. Mustache wrangler.

My wife is fascinated by the names. As a writer, she finds the credits to be a great source of names for characters to use in her own writing.

When I watch the list scroll past I am struck by many thoughts. What constitutes enough contribution to be included in the credits? Who keeps track of them all? Which of those people was the credit roll list keeper? Is that an official movie making job title? How much does it pay? What is a “best boy“?

One of my most arduous tasks in the corporate world was to create the list of all who contributed to a project so that they could be recognized upon successful completion. This came easily for some projects. Others were so complex, spanning so many departments, over so many months, that we would miss a few people. I used to joke that creating the list of all who contributed was harder than the project itself.

And yet… It is so vitally important. Not to that project. To the next one. It’s always about the next one.

The point of the credit roll at the end of a successful project is to plant the seeds of enthusiasm for participating in the next project. The anticipation of being recognized is far more powerful than the recognition itself. Conversely, the negative impact of missing someone as part of the recognition at the end of a project is far more damaging than the positive impact to those you remembered. Getting that list right is arduous, but worth it.

Starting a big project? Start your list NOW. Pay attention. Keep track. No contribution is too small.

This isn’t about “everyone gets a trophy.” It’s about giving people their moment in the spotlight, letting them know that you noticed them. Be generous in your recognition and praise.

Roll the credits.

 

Don’t Wait Until You’re Dead

Image of tombstone
Photo copyright ©2017 David J Crone. All rights reserved

What will be on your tombstone?

The one in the image above jumped out at me for its utter simplicity. (In case you can’t see the photo, the inscription says, “C.L. Died 22 Aug 1783”.) Perhaps C.L. didn’t leave behind enough funds to carve additional letters into the stone. Or, perhaps that’s all that needed to be said. I prefer to believe it was the latter.

What message will you leave behind when you are gone?

A friend of mine reacted to last week’s post about Admiration vs Jealousy, sharing with me that he found out that he was admired and respected by someone only after that person died. The revelation meant the world to my friend as he held this person in equally high regard. That got me thinking.

Who do you admire? Who do you respect? Have you told them?

As it turns out, I admire this particular friend of mine. So, when he shared his comments with me, I took that opportunity to let him know it. He was touched.

How does it make you feel to know that someone admires and/or respects you? If feels pretty good, doesn’t it? Why, then, do we not share our feelings of admiration more readily?

Don’t make those you appreciate wait until you’re dead to find out. Pick up the phone. Send them a card. Shoot them a quick text message. You don’t need to make a big deal about it. Simply be earnest. You can be specific, such as, “I respect you for the way that you…” Or, “I admire you for the way that you…” Perhaps you might tell them that you look up to them, that you find them to be inspiring. The important thing is to let them know.

Let me start. I appreciate YOU for reading this blog. I appreciate the comments, the encouragement and the challenges to my words. I hope that you find some value here along the way. [Note: Comments on the blog itself are disabled because it’s too much effort to ward off the auto-bots and other nefarious attempts to use my blog as a platform from which to attack others. But, email comments are always welcome as are comments left on the various social media platforms where this gets published.]

As for my tombstone, I hope that I will have said the things that needed to be said while I was alive, making any words on the stone superfluous.

 

Building Castles

Photo of the Great Hall at Stirling Castle
Photo copyright ©2017 David J Crone. All rights reserved.

I just returned from a trip to the UK. While there, we toured a number of castles. One of those was Stirling Castle in Scotland. The photo above is the Great Hall.

The main stories we heard during our visit to Stirling Castle were about King James VI of Scotland, who later became King James I of England.

What struck me in the stories was how much effort King James put into validating his right to rule. Much of the architecture and decorative elements of the castle were intended specifically to demonstrate that he was the rightful ruler.

How much time and energy do you devote to validating your right to lead?

I have certainly worked for people who spent an inordinate amount of time justifying their right to be in the position they were in. These are often the people who get tied up in titles, seating charts at meetings, and other trivialities that distract from doing the real work at hand.

I get it. If you are a King who came to power by  conquering, you probably do need to expend some amount of energy telling people you belong there. You really do need to worry about people who would like to cut off your head.

How many of you can honestly say that your life is in danger if people do not accept you as their leader? How much time are you wasting to make yourself feel safe?

Here’s a thought. Instead of working to ensure your own safety and well-being, try working to ensure the safety and well-being of those you lead. Do that and you will be the beloved king who others willingly rally around to defend.

 

Do you trust your co-workers this much?

Amazon is building two large data centers in my neighborhood. That means they need power. Lots of power. And redundancy.

Each of the two data centers has a new power substation. The next phase is installing redundant power feeds to these substations.

For the last couple months they have been running new power lines along the large transmission towers that feed the new substations. Have you ever wondered how they do that? I happened to capture a bit of it from my phone in this video:

(If the video isn’t in your view, here’s the direct link: https://youtu.be/08idUIjEkN4)

As I watched these people working, it occurred to me how much trust there must be between the individuals on this crew. The obvious one is the guy (we’re just going to go with “guy” here) hanging in the harness. Clearly he has to have an enormous amount of trust in the helicopter pilot. A friend tells me the line on the other side of this tower are live, at 138,000 Volts. Ouch!

The less obvious trust factor is on the pilot’s part. Let’s face it, if that guy hanging in the harness gets tangled, the pilot is in just as much trouble.

Do you have that level of trust with your co-workers?

While this level of immediate self-destruction might not result if either you or your co-worker fails at their job, there is still a need for trust. There is still a level of dependency. At the most base level, each of you is depending on the organization for which you work to be financially viable so that your paychecks can continue. That relies on the overall success of the organization, which in turn relies on each individual doing their job.

Do you trust your co-workers? Do they trust you? For better or worse, you are in this together.

 

Doing the Hokey Pokey

You put your left hand in, you put your left hand out, you put your left hand in, and you shake it all about…

Do you know the song? I’m sure you do. Sorry if it is now stuck in your head.

What does that have to do with making work fun? Everything.

It is coming up on 4 years since I left the comforts of the corner office to pursue this dream of being a full-time corporate entertainer and speaker. But, it is only a bit over a month since I closed the last door on my former world of being an IT guy.

Soon after leaving the full-time IT executive job, I signed on with an IT services company as a consultant, doing odd projects as they fit my schedule and interest. It was very sporadic. The projects were few and far between. But, it kept me connected to the old world. Why? I guess I was keeping a toe in the waters. You might call it a plan B. You know, if this puppet thing doesn’t work out, I can always go back.

What it did, though, was provide excuses. It allowed me to hold back in pursuing some gigs when I really needed to be aggressive to win them. It allowed me to say to myself, “Oh, it doesn’t matter that you don’t have any gigs next month. You can just go fill in with some IT stuff.”

Then when I would get calls for IT projects, I found myself being annoyed. I didn’t really want to do that work. The joy in that work is no longer there for me. And every time I was out on one of those jobs, I would be thinking about all of the opportunities I was missing by not being able to return that phone call immediately, or polish that new joke I had been working on.

So, I finally pulled the plug, closed the door, moved on. Pick your own metaphor. Whatever you call it, I quit the IT consulting job. There is no more safety net.

Darren LaCroix tells a story of getting started in the speaking business, making reference to an old job he clung to for security. He says a friend told him, “That’s not a safety net. It’s a drag net.” There is so much truth to that statement.  (Side note: Darren produces some of the best speaker training programs available.)

What are you clinging to from your past? What pond are you still dipping a toe into for some sense of security? Where are you simply being stubborn about letting go?

If you really, truly want to achieve your goals, you have to be committed. You have to be all in.

Stop putting only a left hand, or a right foot in your pursuit of your dreams. Get to the end of the song. Put your whole self in and shake it all about.